Baby planning and Standard of Care Issues

Hi all!
I hope you had a lovely and entertaining holiday with your families and friends. Our holidays were busy, on top of hectic, with a dash of crazy. My stress even manifested itself in the form of a stye in my left eye. Be thankful if you have no clue what one of those is.
I decided it would be better to start my post holiday posts with something decidedly non-holiday/resolution/etc. Baby Planning.
I know that many of you are going to say that you can't exactly plan a baby. You can start trying to get pregnant during a certain time frame, but your actual date of conception and due date are at the mercy of a higher power.
Husband and I have been talking a lot about when we would like to try for baby #2 and we are both very sure as to when. This also brought about the discussion of prenatal care. I'm not sure if you understand how military health care works so I'll break down simply. There are two types of Tricare, Standard and Prime. Those who are at E-6 and above pay grade are given a choice between the two. The most prominent difference being that you do not pay any type of deductible for medical care under Prime. Of course we chose Prime being that we weren't interested in paying if we didn't have to. There is a major problem with this. The level of care that you receive in military facilities where pregnancy is concerned is adequate at best.
My experiences during my first pregnancy have lead me to decide to switch to Standard for my next baby so I can see a private doctor. Let me walk you through a pregnancy with Prime and strictly military health facilities. When you call the doctor to confirm pregnancy they tell you to come in for a blood test. No ultrasound. The blood test confirms your pregnancy and you are assigned to an OBGYN. In my case, the OBGYN visits took place in the Army hospital. Upon my first visit I was kind of jarred by the fact that I had to take a number from a Deli machine and wait until my number was called. First red flag.
I was never guaranteed that I would see the same OBGYN, nope I got whoever was available. I don't understand how they could see important factors that might lead them to believe that I had issues/complications. This was a major problem because I did have an issue, I had a condition known as Hypermesis Gravidarum (HG).

"Hyperemesis gravidarum (HG) is a severe form of nausea and vomiting in pregnancy. It is generally described as unrelenting, excessive pregnancy-related nausea and/or vomiting that prevents adequate intake of food and fluids. If severe and/or inadequately treated, it is typically associated with:

• loss of greater than 5% of pre-pregnancy body weight (usually over 10%)
• dehydration and production of ketones
• nutritional deficiencies
• metabolic imbalances
• difficulty with daily activities" (HER Foundation, 2013).

If I'd had the same OBGYN the entire time she would have noticed that I was gradually losing about 20 lbs throughout my pregnancy. That I was getting sick so often that I turned up at the ER because my throat was bleeding. That I could barely get through daily activities without vomiting.

(At 26 weeks most women are complaining about gaining too much weight and swelling. My pants were falling down because I had lost too much weight.)

Eating was a daily challenge, I knew that I had to put healthy foods into my body to nourish my developing baby. The doctor finally noticed my significant weight loss after I was well into my second trimester. I was put on an anti-nausea med that is most often prescribed to cancer patients going through chemo therapy. In order to be able to even look at food or keep it down I had to take this medication regularly.

The story does have a good ending however. My daughter was born two weeks early, and she was an adorably healthy little peanut at 6 lbs 9.5oz. I finished my BA in Health and Wellness this past year, and because of what I had gone through I became vigilant about researching prenatal health. I had no idea that there was an actual name for the condition that I had. I learned that I should expect and fight for a better standard of care for myself and my unborn child. If you don't do it, no one will. My next pregnancy will be better, because I will make sure that I am given the care that I need.

25 Before 2014

I decided that I would follow suit with my friends Jessica and Amanda and do the 25 Questions before 2014 post. I think this is a much better way to do a review of your year and see what you would like to change in the new year than resolutions.  

1. What am I most proud of this year? I am so proud of our accomplishments as a family. We finally took a road trip we've been planning for the better part of 4 years, we bought a new home, and we've begun planning our vow renewal.

2. How can I become a better _friend_? I think that sometimes I get too involved, I need to let things lie with some friends. I think I tend to over think situations and it often makes for uncomfortable conversations. I've been working on this one already and I can say that it has been very successful thus far!


3. Where am I feeling stuck? Careerwise. I have applied to job after job since moving to Connecticut and I have yet to hear anything. It definitely does a number on your confidence.

4. Where do I need to allow myself grace? Weight gain. I know that I've put on some weight during our PCS and the holidays. However, my schedule was nowhere near normal in the last 4 months so I need to move forward instead of beating myself up.

5. Am I passionate about my career? My career currently would be parenting. Yes, I will always be passionate about parenting my children. So much so that I am already getting excited to plan for baby #2.

6. What lessons have I learned? Life is what you make it. Happiness can be situational and based on the life you make wherever you happen to be.
 
7. What did my finances look like? Our finances look pretty good! We paid off a lot of bills prior to buying our home. We're still paying off student loans, but I only just graduated in March.
8. How did I spend my free time? I read a lot of books, spent a lot of time painting, and playing The Sims (I'm addicted).
 9. How well did I take care of my body, mind, and soul? I took much better care of my body at the start of the year. I ran my longest race (8 miles) in February. The last bit hasn't been so friendly to my body. I've been caring for mind much more by opening myself to educated debate and reading as always. I think my soul got an extra dose of care this year, I have been working to mend broken friendships and working on some personal flaws that are changeable. 

10. How have I been open-minded? I'm becoming more accepting of other people's opinions. Do I agree with all of them? Certainly not, but I can see things from their side and become less biased about issues. I'm also being more accepting of advice I'm given, but always with a grain of salt.

11. When did I feel most creatively inspired? I'm an artist. I am almost always creatively inspired. It gets pretty hard to turn my left brain off.

12. What projects have I completed? Moving into our new home would have to be the only thing I technically completed.

13. How have I procrastinated? I would honestly say that I haven't really procrastinated. I've had to put stuff on the back burner due to husband's work schedule. Planning our vow renewal for instance, I feel behind the game, but that's no fault of my own. We had to wait until our funding was in place and until we were back in the NorthEast. These things were all dependent upon my husband's job.

14. In what ways can I re-structure my time? I don't really see where I would need to restructure. I usually make the most of what time I have.

15. How have I allowed fear of failure to hold me back? Not at all. Being an artist, the fear of failure is constant, but you have to put yourself out there.

16. Where has self-doubt taken over? In the career area, I wonder if I will ever find a job!

17. When have I felt the most alive? On our big road trip! Standing on the edge of the Grand Canyon, touring a haunted house, driving down Route 66. :)

18. How have I taught others to respect me? I have gotten much better at expressing how I feel without becoming confrontational. Discussion is important in any relationship. Dissecting a situation and learning to diffuse any hard feelings.

19. How can I improve my relationships? I think backing off a little. I can get really intense. Time to learn to let things go.

20. Have I been unfair to anyone? Certainly. 

21. Who do I need to forgive? I've forgiven a lot this year, I think I'm all set here.

22. Where is it time to let go? I think that I've done a lot of letting go along with the forgiving.

23. What old habits would I like to release? The constant Facebooking. I think there needs to be a support group for those of us who get too into it. I got roped in really hard since my husband used to be away a lot.

24. What new habits would I like to cultivate? Cooking at home more often. I won't lie, I love cheeseburgers and fries. If I make a good meal at home that I have planned I am more likely to skip the drive thru.

25. How can I be kind to myself? Allowing myself the time to create a schedule here in CT. It's hard to get your footing and find your happy place in a new duty station. I'm working at it every day :)

I hope everyone enjoys their holidays! New Girl will be back after Christmas :D

Mommy Needs a Break

Have you ever read an article on Facebook and thought "wow, they get me". Well this popped up in my feed a couple days ago and I really wanted to hug the woman that wrote it. There never really is a good way to express to your working husband that you need a break without feeling like you're discounting that they've been working all. day. long.

This has to be one of my favorite scenes from Family Guy, like, ever. Now I just want to give Lois a hug because Evie has been pulling this crap on me for the past two weeks. She is adorable and cute and I love her, but sometimes I just want to play on my computer by myself. I'm getting to the point where I feel like all of my nerves are on the outside of my body and Evie is poking them.

I guess what's driving me the most crazy is that it's the holiday season and stuff is just nuts. I would usually get a reprieve when John returns, but no such luck this time. It's gonna be holiday prep to spending time with family, to spending time with family, to spending time with family.

I've been seriously lacking in the adult conversation department due to the fact that I've yet to make adult friends here in Connecticut. Something's gotta give! I watch Disney Jr. for hours a day, to the point where I've wanted to strangle Mickey Mouse with his high pitched voice. 

I'm so sorry Mickey, you get the aggression.

So yeah, mommy really needs a break. The good news is that John will be home on Wednesday! I just want to take a warm bubble bath with a book, without Evie frantically knocking on the door because she can't get her Minnie Mouse bow on. *sigh* It's uphill from here. 

Putting on the Fat Pants

Ok Ryan Gosling, whatever you say. The cookies I had this week at the cookie party and in the baking process tasted soooo good. I couldn't really control myself, especially since I've been in a spiral of terrible eating since we left Hawaii. THAT WAS 3 MONTHS AGO!!!

As I stuffed my face with more food this weekend I started to feel like poo. What am I doing?! I completely gave up on healthy eating in the interest of laziness and legit Chinese takeout. It seemed like a good enough excuse until my larger size jeans started to feel a little tight.

Let me explain something, I always keep two different sizes of jeans in my wardrobe. I'm human, I know that I'm going to have some times where I need to put on the big pants. Well, I put on the big pants and they're feeling a little tight. Oops!

So as of last night I put down my diet coke and decided to start getting healthy again. The first thing I did was run a painful 3.25 miles on the treadmill. Gosh, I feel much better now. That healthy habit gave way to another. Instead of scarfing yet another french bread frozen pizza (since my sailor is away) I scarfed about a half a bag of spinach worth of salad. It tasted amazing after that run. I didn't have that nasty fried food hangover either.

So there's my first step. Let's see if we can keep this ball rolling.

In My Makeup Bag: Beauty on A Budget

Hey everyone! I've decided to do a monthly feature on what's in my makeup bag. I figured it would be fun to show you what I'm into each month and maybe you'll find some new favorites too! To start, here is my makeup bag:

My makeup bag is a bit on the larger side. I've been known to live out of it for 1-3 months at a time due to our crazy Navy family schedule. That being said, I need room for my essentials and little extras. I'm not a "one look" kinda gal. This month's theme is Beauty on a Budget, between buying a home recently and purchasing Christmas gifts beauty products are not the biggest priority. Anyways, let's get to what's inside!

1. Cover Girl Great Lash BIG Mascara

This has been my go to mascara for as long as I can remember. When I started wearing makeup in my teenage years this was one of my first purchases. It's very affordable at only $5.75. It's also the best working within it's price range. It's never clumpy or flaky, and it gives me the naturally enhanced lashes that I look for.

2. NYX Enchanted Kiss Butter Gloss Set

My sister in law got me hooked on NYX cosmetics. 90% of beauty vlogger/bloggers/gurus out there use at least one item from them. I picked up this set at Ulta for less than the $10 retail cost. That comes to less than $2 per gloss, quite a steal. The colors are flattering to any skin tone, and it's a great basic starter set for those who are just starting with lip color. It's not sticky and it does feel pretty buttery on the lips. This would make a great Christmas gift or stocking stuffer for your makeup loving friends.

3. Zoya nail polish in Giovanna

Zoya nail polishes run for about $8 per bottle. This is pretty general as far as better quality nail polishes go. I received this color in my Ipsy bag, which is my $10 per month beauty sample subscription. Being that it was full size and included with 4 other samples it was basically a steal. Giovanna is an awesome holiday green color, pretty fun for those who are tired of the same old reds. 

4. NYX Eyebrow Push-Up Bra 

NYX pretty much has it in the bag for me this month. I LOVE combo products, it saves me room in my makeup bag. This eyebrow/highlighter combo pencil is awesome for cleaning up brow shape and making them look lifted. I was having a serious Groucho Marx type eyebrow issue lately and this seriously improved that.

(Not a good look! Eeek!)

This combo pencil retails for $10 on a regular basis. I got mine for $7.50 because Ulta was running a sale (yay!).

5. Neutrogena Makeup Remover Wipes

These are easily the best and most affordable makeup removing wipes out there. I have very sensitive skin and scrubbing away at eyeliner can really irritate my skin. These are very gentle and don't have an icky smell. You can pick these up for about $5 pretty much anywhere. It's important to wash your makeup off daily. 

My covetable item of the month:

The Naked3 Palette

This is a big one. I own the Naked2 palette and I use it almost daily. Naked3 is a neutral palette as well, but all the colors are rose-hued. I have a little obsession with rose gold, so this palette made me screech out loud when it was announced via email. (Seriously, John looked at me like I was a nutcase)

 The unfortunate part is that it doesn't come cheap, $52!!!

That is why it's my covet item, I simply cannot afford it. I'm hoping Santa is sweet to me and maybe brings this along. If not, I can always wait until there's a sale since it's not a limited edition item. The price tag is legit on these, Urban Decay makes high quality, highly pigmented makeup with amazing color payoff. So wearable. (This was not endorsed in any way, I just love them that much).

What are your favorite affordable beauty products? What is something that you might be coveting but can't afford/bring yourself to spend the money on?

Mommy Goals

I am sitting here not believing that Evie will be 3 in April. How?!?

(Fun fact: Since Evie is so tall many mistake her for being 3 and 1/2 to 4 years old!)

The biggest and most daunting thing is that Evie has yet to be potty trained. Some people may be wondering why Evie isn't using the potty yet. I can easily explain this away with our hectic schedule over the past three months. We packed up and moved from our home in Hawaii, took a 2 and a half week road trip, spent one month house hunting/buying, and any of the rest of the time has been spent moving in and unpacking. *phew!* So, I'm willing to bet you don't blame me at this point.

Based on Evie's reaction every time I ask her if she wants to use the potty: "Noo, no, no, no!!" I'm guessing the potty looks something like this to her.

(10 bonus points for whoever can tell me which move this is from!!)

I'm hoping to get her to use the potty without bribery. Honestly, Evie is so spoiled these days that I doubt stickers or candy are much incentive to use the evil potty. 

Do you know any good methods for potty training? What worked for your children?